Random

Bizarre weekend! Was all looking forward to Popstarz on friday and then for some reason on the way into town i seemed to develop a foul mood, God knows why but i was a bit bugged by something, it was lovely to see loads of mates out but i was just not feeling it. To everyone that came out with me i apologise it was just one of those nights.

Saturday i was up bright and early and went to meet my friends Clare and Verity, We were hoping to get bargain tickets for that night's performance of "Dirty Dancing" but there was no way in gay hell, we were on a budget of £30 ish and the cheapest tickets they had were £75. So instead we plumped for "Little Shop of Horrors", i had not heard much about the production but the cast included Alistair MacGowan and Sheridan Smith (the blonde actress from 2 pints of lager and a packet of crisps). I loved it, the set was fantastic, the songs were great and there was not a bad performance in sight! The day also included lunch on the south bank which was great and the weather was just gorgeous!

Worked quite a bit yesterday and then hooked up with mash up mates last night, why i did this on a sunday is beyond me!! All good fun though.

I still seem to have flits of the wierd mood i had on friday night but cant put my finger on what is up. I shall keep you posted on my mental health downfall.

I see Boy George has been arrested again for tying a rent boy up in his flat and not letting him go. This has started to make me feel better about the state of my love life.

Kate Moss is launching her line at Topshop tonight, i hear she is going to snort it with a rolled up fiver!

Enjoy the sun!!

xx

Lily Allen is a c**t

Oh Lily, Lily, Lily how i loathe you so! I had the distinct displeasure of hearing the whole of her debut album this week and frankly her voise is shocking, she sounds like a child with a sore throat choking on a strepsil. She keeps banging on about her famous dad whose biggest role so far has been playing a corpse in shallow grave - hold back on the baftas!. Also she has the nerve to say that Madonna is overrated! People have been saying that Lily's debut album is the best thing since bread came sliced - its got 2 cover versions on it!! not even old covers - kaiser chiefs and the kooks! sort it out girl and lets hope that the difficult 2nd album never rears its ugly head.

So Huge Grant has been arrested for throwing a tin of beans at a paparazzi guy. I know that most of the time these guys are just doing their jobs but the way they go about it is truly shocking, Seeing clips on youtube of people like Victoria Beckham, Lindsay Lohan and Jessica Simpson looking quite petrified to be surrounded but 20 - 30 photographers screaming at them, it's quite horrific. I am not saying that anyone deserves violence but sometimes its better to back off.

There was a distinct smoky smell in soho last night, it turned out that "New Look" on Oxford Street had flames pouring out of the windows, thankfully no one was injured but the stock is ruined - £4.50 worth of damage, its a sad, sad day for polyester wearers!

I think this weekend is going to be rather hectic, there are plans everywhere and loads of people doing loads of things, how i shall fit it all in is a mystery. I can't wait for tonight - its been ages since i went out dancing and there is a great little posse coming out with me too.

THE IMAGINARY MEN OF PIPPY'S BOUDOIR!
This guy has not been in many films that i know of recently, I last saw him wet, topless and angry in Britney Spears "Everytime" video. He is quite simply fit and gorgeous and does not seem to like wearing shirts which is fine by me. It's the lovely Stephen Dorff!!

Well my lovelies its time to sign off for another week, next week is jam packed with all kinds of fun and next fridays boudoir is a tribute!! I am going to select my top 5 hotties from boudoirs gone by but with hotter pics!! Dont for a second think that i have run out of men, i aint that picky!!

Enjoy the sun
xx

My right arm lies bleeding on the floor, I feel naked and vulnerable, My existence a soft and ungraspable cloud! What has brought on this dire state, this traumatic time - my ipod has broken!!!! It all happened on tuesday i was on the train and the screen just froze and then i put the ipod to my ear and it was making the saddest little sound!! I am off to the Apple store tomorrow and am basically planning to break down in tears whilst pathetically begging for assistance. Here's hoping i shall have my working ipod back soon!

I have now fully recovered from my weekend!! It really was so much fun! This weekend is beginning to take shape - mainly the shape of a large bottle of vodka! I am off to Popstarz tomorrow night. I used to go all the time but then it started to fill up with Mcfly looking sons of bitches but apprently now it is attracting a slightly older crowd, so hopefully i wont be the only one on the dancefloor when "The Smiths" come on.

Congratulations are in order, My friend Dan has just got a spankingly fabulous new job and my friend Mike ran the London Marathon on sunday and completed it in under 4 hours which i think deserves a round of applause - you can indeed go girl! snap, snap snap!!

I am so sick of being single at the moment! At the weekend the majority of people there were in couples and although they were all lovely, it just made me think that i have been in this state for a long time, I have written about this before and you may be reading this thinking "well if you stopped watching tv all the time and reading heat magazine (which only takes 10 mins anyway) you might actually find a man" - its not like i am not out there, i am a regular scene goer, i work with the gays, i have more internet profiles than you can shake a dick at and still nothing, nadda, dip, squat! I aint saying that guys aren't interested but i need to feel that za za zoom!! that feeling in your stomach that wraps you up in knots, the kind of guy whose text messages you save. Where is he? Maybe he will be at popstarz tomorrow night or the train home this evening. I guess i shall just have to keep my eyes open and my wits about me which after a few drinks is never the easiest thing to do.

I was watching the orange playlist last night, its basically a show hosted by Jayne Middlemiss where she asks a celebrity about their favourite music, last night it was the turn of Danny Dyer and he is just so perfect! I cannot find fault with him, he comes across as being a total bit of rough but ya can tell that under that bravado he is just a big softie! He is also refreshingly honest and says what he thinks about celebs, drugs, crime and sex. I would love to be his bit of stuff!! Just to hear him say "alright darlin, wheres my fackin dinner?" - ooh baby!! dream on!

xx

Bumpkin bumming in the country Well there is nothing like a nice long weekend in the country!! It was my friend's Mel and Rachels birthdays and so 15 of us descended on Hurdlow Grange just outside Buxton. We were in the middle of nowhere with the most ridiculous amount of alcohol!! As relaxing as the weekend was supposed to be i have come back quite shattered - i even managed to do a 5 and a half mile walk at one point!! Am back in the city now and have lots of fun plans for the week and weekend. I am rather tired now though so tomorrow's blog will hopefully be more interesting. laters x

Well this weekend i am doing something i have never done before but there is very little i can say about it now, full details on monday

i had resigned myself to the fact that i was not going to the Live Earth gig at Wembley Stadium but my girl Pete has managed to secure 2 tickets for the gig!! That is going to be one amazing week, the saturday before its London Gay Pride, then on the tuesday i am seeing that mad diva Tori Amos, 2 days later i am seeing the utterly lickable Justin Timberlake and the 2 days after that its Live Earth!!!

THE IMAGINARY MEN OF PIPPY'S BOUDOIR

I do my fair share of walking but if i came across a sight like this i would stagger off the pavement and be crushed by a bus! Its the lush Ryan Philippe!!He is 100% fit and after seeing "Cruel Intentions" i can confirm that he has an ass like 2 scoops of butter pecan ice cream! yumma yumma yumma yumma

Stray dogs, starving people - the solution seems obvious!

xx

Traumatic TV

I was watching TV the other night and there was a documentary on Channel 4 about foxes in London. The first half of the documentary was all very sweet with cute images of foxes playfully making their way around London grabbing any food that they could. The 2nd part focused on a pretentious family in Stoke Newington who had decided that a city garden would be the perfect place to keep chickens. They built an area to keep 10 chickens in using shabby wood and wire and were horrified the morning after to find that foxes had made their way through the wite and killed their chickens.

I think most relatively sane people would have got in touch with the RSPCA to put down humane traps to catch the foxes but i overestimated the level of human kindness, instead they hired a guy from urban pest control to shoot the foxes. Over the next week the owner of the house put out loads of food to entice the foxes. There were 2 foxes involved, one was collecting food for the other fox who was pregnant. One night the foxes were so hungry they went out together, they slowly made there way across the garden and were then blown away by 2 bullets fired by the hitman from an upstairs window. This was such troubling tv.

I know that foxes are considered a pest but this family were truly vile! and they were surprised that shooting those 2 did not rid them of the problem, more foxes kept coming. Humans are prett disgusting we litter our towns and dont secure our rubbish properly and then we have the nerve to blame foxes for eating food to survive so instead of changing our habits we just kill them. This programme made me ashamed. It turns out after much contemplation that people in general are assholes.

So today is Live Earth text and ticket day, Have i received a text? have i bogroll! If anyone would care to help me to get to this gig it would be much appreciated. I already missed out on Glastonbury - life cannot be this cruel!

Julie Walters has signed up to play TV monitoring bitch troll Mary Whitehouse! Loves it!!

Remember a while ago i posted about the hideous religious freaks - the Phelps family (they picket the funerals of american soldiers and gays) well they are now planning to picket the funerals of the people killed in this weeks campus killings. You can fill in the rest as i am speechless.

xx

What can be said about the truly awful university shootings in Virginia? It's just all so senseless especially at an educational establishment, a supposed space of hope and safety. I just hope that this leads to a change in the way America and the rest of the world sees gun control so such events may never be allowed to happen again Thoughts are with all the people that were involved or have been affected by this tragedy

you try and do something nice....

Well that bitch Madonna has gone to Malawi again to oversee the building of a children's healthcare centre, what a manipulative cow! - using her money to ensure that hundreds of orphans have a better shot at life - well she can just do one as far as i am concerned

Only joking!, sadly it seems the British press have it in for her at the moment and are now accusing her of wanting to "buy" another baby. I hate to go on about my hatred of the way the press have handled this but it is so ridiculous. I can remember Robbie Williams getting slagged off his work with UNICEF and his angry response in one of his documentaries was spot on - when the press do something that benefits anyone but themselves they can pass judgement but until then they can fuck off!

I had a much needed night in last night and for the 1st time i watched a coupld of episodes of "Grey's Anatomy" - well i was blown away, what a fantastic show! funny and sad and brilliant in equal measures. Check it out on sunday nights on Channel 5!

Last week there were rumours that Jesse Metcalfe (the droolworthy gardener from "Desperate Housewives") was going to take over from Daniel Radcliffe in "Equus" when he finishes his run in June. I was dribbling into a beaker at the very thought!! However, it seems they were just rumours.It seems that Jamie Bell (Billy Elliot) is going to be taking his kit off in the West End! I am quite worryingly excited about this too. I hope i aint turning into one of those strange men on buses who sits with his hand in his trousers - that would be highly unfortunate.

Have been downloading quite a few new tunes recently to familiarise myself with the hit parade! Love "Stop me" by Mark Ronson, "Over my head" by The Fray, "Earth Intruders" by Bjork and "Away from here" By The Enemy.

Laters

xx

EXCLUSIVE!! Sarah Harding from Girls Aloud is featured on the cover of the April 10th issue of OK! Magazine. The 2 headlines on the cover read "My saucy night with Brad Pitt" "That run in with Lindsay Lohan" These headlines do not entirely match the content inside. The saucy night with Brad Pitt? = "I'd still love to snog Brad Pitt though, i stayed in watching "fight club" last week and spent the whole night ogling his body" She watched a frikkin dvd!!! Moving onto her run in with Lindsay Lohan = "I've met Lindsay before and didn't really like her that much" shocking! what did the police say after a run in like that? were you cautioned? purrrlease! I aint blaming Sarah Harding it's bloody OK! magazine, what a blatant couple of lies!! Hope you are all enjoying the sunshine xx

Well the Live Earth ticket registration site is open!! I cant believe i might get the chance to see Madonna at Wembley Stadium!! I am moist at the very suggestion!

For once i dont have much planned this weekend, I think due to last weekend being so mash up i need to take it easy and just chill out.

I went to the Retro Bar last night with Oliver, Claire and Chris. They were hosting a very bizarre Eurovision night, I have never seen the downstairs bar so rammed!! Gays and Eurovision - i just dont get it. I know its camp and tacky - but really its just a bunch of crap songs that are rarely heard of ever again. Meanwhile upstairs the key question of the night was - What exactly did Mother Theresa do? Can you answer it without googling? None of us could, I imagine she has had a dramatic effect on sales of moisturiser and anti wrinkle cream but apart from that its a mystery. I dont mean to cause offence i am sure she was a champion bird.

Yay for the "Hollyoaks" gay story rearing it's head again, there was even a bit of kissing this week! I love the fact that now the character John-Paul has come out, a "Brokeback Mountain" poster has suddenly appeared on his wall, whatever next buttless chaps?

THE IMAGINARY MEN OF PIPPY'S BOUDOIR!

Today's man has been recommended by the best cheescake maker on the planet!! Yay it's Miss Camilla! Now i am never too sure about this guy, I kinda think he shouts too much on his MTV show "punkd" but he is on disc 5 of my Oprah DVD box set talking about why he loves his stunning wife Demi Moore and his bottom lip starts to quiver and frankly that sets my thighs quivering! Bless him. In this pic he looks particularly smouldering!! It's Ashton Kutcher



Play safe kids

xx

Roseanne!! I expected more from you!

In the 90's i was a huge fan of the American sitcom "Roseanne", I had every episode on tape and watched them constantly, loving the down to earth humour and quick one liners. The show was groundbreaking in many ways, It portrayed a realistic view of an American working class family and covered issues such as teenage sex, domestic violence, death and sexuality. The shows leading star - Roseanne Barr was outspoken and unapologetic and for this i truly admired her.

For the last 10 years Roseanne Barr has faded away but now she is back doing stand up comedy and again being outspoken but i think she may need to pick her battles more carefully. This week she has been quoted as saying

"Never once in my 54 years have I ever once heard a gay or lesbian person who's politically active say one thing about anything that was not about them. They don't care about minimum wage, they don't care about any other group other than their own self because you know, some people say being gay and lesbian is a totally narcissistic thing and sometimes I wonder. I've never heard any of them say anything except for 'Accept me 'because I'm gay"

Roseanne has since apologised saying that her statement was taken out of context and what she meant to say was

"everybody needs to unite right now, and step outside of their own neighbourhoods, groups, races and classes to stop Bush's war on our country and our people"

She has also added a huge apology to the gays. Girlfriend just needs to think a bit more before opening her mouth but i guess we can all be guilty of that. Its just that we dont have our words plastered on the news around the world - thank god!

xx

I need help! I am obsessed!

Hey people,

I have a problem and am not sure how it can be fixed - i have become obsessed with an out of reach actor!! I cant stop watching him and even stayed awake last night watching him read cbeebie childrens stories on the internet!!! He has featured in my boudoir before but the obsession has grown into something quite unhealthy! The actor is Richard Armitage star of the BBC period drama "North and South", He also played "The Vicar of Dibley's" husband in their xmas specials. He is probably better known for playing Guy of Gisborne in the new "Robin Hood" series. Why do i love him so? He is tall, He has dark hair, His voice is very deep and sexy and thankfully he is a good actor. I just know it's a bad sign when i start scouring the internet for fan sites just so i can find out what he is up to. Something tells me i might need a real man to occupy my time very soon! This easter has been fun, My friend Dan has been staying with me which has been great. Saw Pete, Kaz and T on friday and had a great night out round Stoke Newington and Angel. Saturday had quite a lazy one and then went to my friend Neil's for a dinner party which was fun and then sunday met loads of mates for drinks in Angel again and then clubbed the night away in Vauxhall!! Yesterday was a write off, thank god BBC1 was showing "Sound of Music" and then onto more4 for "100 greatest musicals" - does it get gayer or better?

It's great to hear that "Our Gracious Leader" Madonna is going to be headlining the "Live Earth" show at Wembley Stadium on the 7th July with other great bands like the Chilli Peppers, Razorlight, Snow Patrol, Foo Fighters and Keane on the bill it should be a great show. One of my favourite bands are reforing this year and they are playing at the same show in America - The Smashing Pumpkins - i am so excited about their new material!!

Another groundbreaking issue of "heat" today - Fat stars on the beach! Vanessa Feltz again! Why do they think we want to see this? One great bit of news from Heat this week is the final official confirmation that the "Sex and the City" girls are going to be strutting in front of the camera for a movie later this year and thankfully it is being written by Michael Patrick King who wrote the majority of the TV scripts.

Laters

xx

It is a good friday!!!

Just a short one today as the sun is shining and i feel the need to be outside!

THE IMAGINARY MEN OF PIPPY'S BOUDOIR

Maroon five are an ok sort of band but their lead singer Adam Levine is tres dreamy!! Those eyes, sexy body art and sweet voice get me moist! Here are a couple of pics - get flicking!!

Have a fab easter weekend, I am off to find the perfect beer garden

xx

What a load of old s**t!!

Well last night was the closing gala of the London Lesbian and Gay Film Festival at the Odeon in Leicester Square. Yours truly managed to blag a ticket and i was mincing around with the whole of the London gay mafia! Air kissing like mad!! The highlight of the night was the hospitality - wine does taste better when its free! Also shoving past Peaches "face looks like a bee sting" Geldof to get to my seat was a whole new kind of fun.

The film - "The Picture of Dorian Gray" was truly awful!! It didn't help that i needed the toilet the second i sat down, so i kinda spent the whole film wishing it to end. You just cant go to the toilet at a world premiere apparently. It was such a pretentious arty farty film! I was so bored i started playing another film in my head!

I went to the afterparty at the British Film Institute and thats where it all went a bit wrong, more free champagne, lager and wine (a great mix!) - i fell into my flat at 3am and am still drunk!! I am sweating cheap chardonnay!

I also saw Chris Parker last night (he played alfie moons brother in Eastenders) it has been heavily rumoured that he is a homosexual, well if i was a young actor who was trying to quash rumours of my bum fun activity i would also be posing for pics at a gay film festival! what a mo!

I was shocked, nay horrified yesterday that the gay magazine "OUT!" in America has outed 4 celebrities, one is a newscaster who i dont really know but the other 3 were such a big surprise! David Hyde Pierce aka Niles from Frasier, Sean Hayes aka Jack from Will and Grace and ......... Jodie "i walk in heels better than she does" Foster - big deal!! Just once i want to be shocked to the core by a celebrity coming out!!

Check back tomorrow for a special easter boudoir boy, Dont worry it's not jesus! Sandals don't do it for me.

xx

Oh my good lord - Keith Richards (Zelda from Terrorhawks) has said that he snorted his dad's ashes during a drugs binge, now i have been off my face a good few times, admittedly never on the same level as Keith but that is just gross!! I doubt his dad's dying wish was to be rushed up his son's nose! Mind you i do imagine that one day i may be snorted by Whitney - what an afterlife i will lead!!

I am off to the closing gala of the London Lesbian and Gay Film Festival tonight. It shames me to say this but i have been in London for 4 years now and i have NEVER been to see a film at the festival. Tonight should be fab though - its taking place at the Odeon Leicester Square with a party afterwards the venue is rumoured to be Soho House - here's hoping that i find some strange pills on the floor, well lets face it if Sadie Frost's baby can find them so can i!! Full details tomorrow

Well due to the easter weekend there really is not much of the week left, the sun is out and the forecast is great! My lovely and indeed lush friend Dan is coming down from Sheffield for a few days so i think we shall mainly be doing impressions of Joss Stone at the Brits and religiously quoting "Ab Fab" to each other but that is the glue that keeps our friendship together - Champagne for Lulu!

I have always been a huge fan of Julian Clary and it was rather sad to hear today that his pianist the "Lovely" Russell Churney had passed away. Their on stage banter was always hilarious and bitter!

"Ladies and gentleman please welcome the oh so lovely Russell Churney, i call him the oh so lovely Russell because when people meet him they generally say "oh""

Kerry "face like a retarded bulldog" Katona has hit back at her ex husbands claims that they were too young to have children and that they originally treated the idea of having kids as being similar to getting a dog. Katona has called him "Evil", Well girl if thats his opinion then thats his opinion, i imagine lots of people who have children quite young don't always think through the consequences. I wonder if Kerry was thinking what the consequences would be when she was snorting coke and lying to the media. Kerry's ex, Brian McFadden is now dating Australia's sweetheart Delta Goodrem and Kerry has just got married to thug number 3 from last week's "Crimewatch" CCTV report.

Right i am off to enjoy the sun

xx

Back on form

After the week i have had i should be hiding under a duvet but i am back big time - its amazing what sleep can do! I have had 2 nights of the best sleep ever. It's "Heat" day today and even though i slag it off every tuesday, i cant stop buying it, its like a reflex action, i walk into the newsagents and my eyes dont even register it but then my arms snaps out like a tropical frog tongue and next thing you know i am throwing £1.65 behind the counter and skipping out of the shop wondering who the fattest celeb is going to be this week - it's always going to be Vanessa Feltz, its never going to be a shock.

Mel B of Scary Spice fame has had a baby girl but who is the daddy?? Eddie Murphy denies that the baby is his. I dont know Mel honey - stop having babies with "allegedly" gay men - it dont make no sense girl!

I managed to watch the big Coronation Street episode last night where it was revealed that Tracy "i'm going upstairs to play me tapes" Barlow was guilty of murder. I must admit i have not watched Corrie for a while and hated the episodes last night - how many hateful people can you fit in one show? and why is it that in soapland it's perfectly acceptable to interrupt a leisurely day time drink in the local with a huge announcement. What if you didn't live on Coronation Street but had taken a wrong turning off Canal Street and just fancied a hot pot and next thing you know you are asking questions like "who the hell is tracey?" and "what has she been found guilty of?" and "what the hell is wrong with that chain smoking womans neck??"

Am i the only one who does not get what the fuss is with Mika? His voice grates on me, I dont mind a bit of "Scissor Sisters" high voiced singing but when it seems to be on every song its just buggin and whats with his hair?? and the whole "i could be straight, i could be gay" stance is so ambiguous i could vomit!

I have been watching "Mobile" on ITV1 for the last 3 weeks, it was the concluding part last night and it has been fantastic! I should not be shocked when ITV does good drama but i really was, it was so well paced and the ending had the best twist!! Plus it had a total hottie in it, He is the guy who played Billy Elliot's brother in the film version, would not mind doing a bit of spinny ballet on his.......

Laters

xx

Testing Times

There are times in life that are sent to test you - test your love, your strength and your emotions. The last few days i have been tested more than ever before. I dont want to go into too much detail on here but my dad had quite a major health scare this week. This has made me discover quite a lot about my family and myself. Sometimes we take our parents for granted, we think they will be there for us always, this is not the case and seeing both your parents at their most vulnerable is truly heartbreaking.

I have cried a huge amount this week and slept very little but one thing has struck me and that is how important my friends are to me. My entire family apart from my brother live up north and i do not get to see them as much as i like but i am truly grateful for the solid friendships i have formed in London and those back home. Thanks to all my friends who have been so supportive in the last few days - you know who you are and you mean the world to me x

Well it has been over a week since my last blog and there is a lot of catching up to do. Sadly due to the family crisis this week, i totally forgot that Glastonbury Tickets went on sale yesterday and so have missed out, although there may be a chance to get tickets at the end of the month. Really, really wanna go - Bjork, Arctic Monkeys, The Killers - grrr!!!

Last night the wonderful Louis Theroux met the notorious and hideous Phelps family in his documentary on BBC2. The Phelps family are members of the Westboro Baptist Church and are most famous for picketing the funerals of American Soldiers and Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual people or basically anyone that they can think of since there is not one ounce of logic in any of their arguments. They are a vile, hateful family who are polluting the minds of the younger members of their family. This is not religion, it's total insanity.

I was watching "Popworld" on T4 the other day and Alex Zane was interviewing Avril Lavigne. I have seen her being interviewed several times and i can now officially say that she is one fuckin miserable bitch!! She never makes eye contact, she always looks bored and gives really dull answers. Ah poor Avril, life is just so hard! i mean selling 24 million albums - how do you cope?? Frikkin courtney love wannabe skank!

I bought a pair of the Madonna sunglasses from H&M, i look like a retarded fly wearing them and can barely see but whatever. Thats hardly the point, the point is i have them!! and they come in a really gorge little case - loves it

Well i was unable to write my blog on friday so you have had to wait for today for

THE IMAGINARY MEN OF PIPPY'S BOUDOIR!

In the last couple of weeks i have given you Brad Pitt and Matt Damon, both quite classic good looking guys so i thought it was time to get a bit random on yer ass so todays hottie is a less famous actor called Jesse Bradford, its the first time i have had a jesse in my boudoir! well apart from me of course (what a big jesse!) Anyway, Jesse first came to my attention in "Bring it on" and has since been in "Swimfan" and "Flags of our fathers". He is just a little cute and has that black hair thing going on which is a win win really!

Cheers,
xx