Anyone else smell desperate?

If you have been reading this blog for longer than a day you will know that i am totally celebrity obsessed, it's a bit of a dirty word these days "celebrity" - it is now associated with total insignificants like Coleen Mcloughlin, Ingrid Tarrant and Abi Titmuss. It hit the news this week that Coleen is launching her own perfume. Desperate would be the scent i would name after all 3 of these women - the only smell they exude is the rancid stench of their fugly partners sex sweat!! Wayne "oink oink" rooney, Chris " so fugly i would even barf chocolate back up" Tarrant and John "my mini mimsy botherer has been in more stinky holes than a pot holer" Leslie. Get a real job girls and stop acting like you are someone, no one knows or cares what you do. I pray for the day that a bouncer actually says to one of them "no, i dont know who you are so get off my ankle!"

Speaking of total loser's - Jodie Marsh is scrabbling around chinawhite's and the embassy club praying that some poor deluded paparazzi guy mistakenly takes a picture of her. She is now taking part in a show on MTV to audition guys to be her husband. She obviously got up one day this week and tucked into a nice steaming hot bowl of crazy! Honey!! it's a bad sign when you have to persuade a TV channel to make a show about you so that other desperate wannabe's (who dont love you!) can marry you, do a photoshoot for OK! magazine, no doubt you will have the poor guys name tattooed on your forehead and then he will sell a story to the daily star for £75 about how you were a bit of a munter and would insist on going out wearing a "make poverty history" band over your mimsy and nothing else.

Take a look in the mirror Jodie - beneath the make up and the fake tan and the base make up and the base foundation - there must be a part of you that realises that there are better things in life.

xx