watch out, the bitch is back on the block!!

yes chums I am back from America after having one of the most amazing holidays ever! New York was immense and very overwhelming - we did it all though, central park, statue of liberty, rockerfeller centre, times square....too much to mention. I am just going to cover some of the highlights and humorous goings on.

One really bizarre thing happened when Oliver and I went to the Stonewall Inn in the west village. I got stopped outside by some guy with a microphone who was collecting soundbites for a gay website that he runs, he wanted to know my opinion on the recent study that stated that gay men's brains are similar to straight women's brains, he wanted to know if I had any particularly feminine qualities - how dare he!!! actually I had just spent the whole day shopping so I guess that counts and my love for "Sex and the City" cannot exactly be described as macho. He then asked me if I thought straight men would ever catch up with gay men in terms of style and flair. I said that they already were with the David Beckham factor, I finished by saying that straight men could never have it all as the gays get to have sex with men.

We also managed to get tickets for a Broadway show, We went to see a matinee performance of a play called "November" starring the amazing Nathan Lane and Laurie Metcalf who is probably best known for playing "jackie" in the sitcom "Roseanne. The play by David Mamet follows the days leading up to the presidential election, Lane plays the shady president Charles Smith and Laurie Metcalf plays his speech writer, Lane is depending on Metcalf to provide him with a career defining speech, She knows how much power she has over him and makes a demand - he can have the speech if he allows her to marry her female partner, this play was so topical and hilariously funny. Lane was pure comic genius and Metcalf had many great moments - Well worth a visit if you are going to New York before the end of July.



One thing that really disturbed me was the visit to Ground Zero, I didn't really want to spend too much time there but as we were walking to it there was a chinese woman sat on a little stoiol on the sidewalk with a little stall selling hologram images - you turn it one way and the twin towers are there, turn it the other and they are gone. I was horrified, How she has not been attacked by people I do not know - I found it disgusting.

The highlight of the holiday for me has to be the "Sex and the City" tour - we managed to get tickets on our last day in New York and I cannot recommnend it enough. It was quite a bargain and you do get to see a huge amount of New York. You also get to see places that are more hidden away such as the beautiful lower west side which is where the majority of filming tales place and where Carrie's house is, even though in the series her address is the upper east side. We had a cupcake outside the bakery where Carrie tells Miranda about her crush on Aidan, We drank Cosmo's at the bar owned by Steve and Aidan and went to the "Pleasure Chest" where Charlotte bought her "Rabbit" vibrator. I am a huge fan of the show and this was the perfect way to spend the day.

Onto Miami which was most welcome as my legs were in such pain with all the walking in New York - our hotel was the gayest thing ever, pink and white throughout. The weather was delicious! and thankfully there were lots of nice shops with very good air conditioning for when it all got too much. Due to the heat we spent quite a bit of time in our gorge hotel room just chilling out, discovering the joys of American reality TV - yes we did the Denise Richards show (hateful bitch who is a little too obsessed with her kids), The Lohan family but my fave has to be the Tori Spelling one - she is actually really funny and her answering the door to her best mate and saying "Hey Bitch" kept me laughing for quite a while.

The cocktails in Miami were way strong and I don't think either of us realised how shitfaced we were getting each night but we had a great time and I bought some fab shirts and t shirts and thankfully got a great tan!! Thanks again to Oliver for sorting the holiday - wherever next?

Speaking of America, there is a very funny piece of gay news - an American Christian news service blanket policy of replacing the word "gay" with "homosexual" has backfired on them in a major way resulting in an american sprinter called Tyson Gay actually appearing on the website as Tyson Homosexual. Headlines featured included "Homosexual eases into 100 final in Olympic trials" and "Close call: Homosexual barely averts major flop in 100″ - only in America.

Anyway life has been carrying on since I got back not quite how I expected but I am not going to go there. So last night i was at the Mayor of London's Pride reception, yes it's that time of year again and since Bojo the clown is now Mayor, he had to do a speech - now in the good old days of Ken Livingstone, he would be the first one there and the last to leave, he would also do a fantastic speech and generally put on a great show. Last night was a different story - Bojo arrived with his entourage and did a really awful speech that was all over the place, made him sound quite out of touch and generally left me feeling quite sad. Who voted him in? I have yet to meet anyone that did.



Due to the massive success of the "Sex and the City" movie it has finally been announced that the cast of "Friends" are getting back together within the next 18 months to hit the big screen. I used to love the show and have all the dvd's - I am sure they will spend time coming up with a great script and any excuse to see Lisa Kudrow again is good enough for me.

Anyways I better actually do some of that work that they pay me for.

xx