Tell me if you can, what makes a man a man

i went on some training yesterday as part of my work, the training's aim was to raise awareness of the issues that young transgender people face. It mainly focused on issue for female to male (ftm) trans guys. It was a fascinating day for me, i had never really thought about the issues before and it really made me think about what it is to be a man.

I rarely look at myself as plainly and simply a man, my sexuality has a huge impact on the way i perceive my self and my maleness. Part of the training yesterday involved doing a quiz that asked pretty stereotypical questions to find out the participants levels of maleness/femaleness and masculinity/femininity. My test results showed that i am definitely a man but i am more feminine than masculine. This was no big surprise to me. As a child i was surrounded by yorkshire men who would never dream of even thinking of themselves in any other way than totally male and totally masculine, the problem was that a lot of the things that made them men appalled me, the way they talked about women, their lack of sensitivity and the rather charming way that they would get drunk and beat the hell out of each other.

I would always sit back and think if that is what a man is then i don't want to be one. There has been much scientific research into why gay men are sometimes more effeminate than straight men, i dont know the answer and i dont care frankly. I am pleased coming out and meeting a more diverse range of people than maybe i would if i was straight has had a massive effect on me but also on the straight guys in my life. The guys that started out not wanting to discuss gay stuff or be around gay bars etc now seem to realise that the gays are human and actually know quite a lot about being men.

I don't want to be tarred with that awful "new man" thing that seemed so popular in the late 90's but i am just saying that there are many ways to be a man and yesterdays training raised my awareness that physical attributes are only a small part of what makes a man. I can remember watching Marc Almond perform at the Royal Albert Hall many years ago and he sang a wonderful song by Charles Aznavour - it just seems to fit quite well in this entry. It's called "What makes a man"

My mum and I we live alone
A great apartment is our home
In Fairhome Towers
I have to keep me company
Two dogs, a cat, a parakeet
Some plants and flowers
I help my mother with the chores
I wash, she dries, I do the floors
We work together
I shop and cook and sow a bit
Though mum does too I must admit
I do it better
At night I work in a strange bar
Impersonating every star
I'm quite deceiving
The customers come in with doubt
And wonder what I'm all about
But leave believing
I do a very special show
Where I am nude from head to toe
After stripteasing
Each night the men look so surprised
I change my sex before their eyes
Tell me if you can
What makes a man a man

At 3 o'clock or so I meet
With friends to have a bite to eat
And conversation
We love to empty out our hearts
With every subject from the arts
To liberation
We love to pull apart someone
And spread some gossip just for fun
Or start a rumour
We let our hair down, so to speak
And mock ourselves with tongue-in-cheek
And inside humour
So many times we have to pay
For having fun and being gay
It's not amusing
There's always those that spoil our games
By finding fault and calling names
Always accusing
They draw attention to themselves
At the expense of someone else
It's so confusing
Yet they make fun of how I talk
And imitate the way I walk
Tell me if you can
What makes a man a man


My masquerade comes to an end
And I go home to bed again
Alone and friendless
I close my eyes, I think of him
I fantasise what might have been
My dreams are endless
We love each other but it seems
The love is only in my dreams
It's so one sided
But in this life I must confess
The search for love and hapiness
Is unrequited
I ask myself what I have got
Of what I am and what I'm not
What have I given
The answers come from those who make
The rules that some of us must break
Just to keep living
I know my life is not a crime
I'm just a victim of my time
I stand defenceless
Nobody has the right to be
The judge of what is right for me
Tell me if you can
What make a man a man


Tell me if you can
Tell me if you can
Tell me if you can
What makes a man a man

Tonight i have the pleasure of seeing Prince again!! It his the last night of his 21 show run at the o2 Arena and i am sure he will pull out all the stops, a full review will be forthcoming!

Last night i went to see "The December Boys" starring Daniel Radcliffe, It was only ok, very little happened and the ending was just so cheesy i could actually hear the audience doing a collective sigh of "whatever".

THE IMAGINARY MEN OF PIPPY'S BOUDOIR

Back in the day before i got bored of Australian soaps, i used to run home from school everyday to catch a glimpse of this guy - He always put the hugest smile on my face, i used to sit on the couch secretly yearning for him! The joy of Oz soaps is that the men rarely wear tops they just parade around looking hot and dreamy!! This guy should have won an award for nailing that acting style, he played Shayne in Home and Away, its the divine Dieter Brummer






Have a great weekend, It's gonna be a beautiful night

xx