Hey

Why do people walk round London looking sideways and then look really put out when they bump into someone, look where you are going you asshole!

Why do people who get that bleep at the ticket barriers that says "seek assistance" just stand there, go and seek some assistance you asshole!

This week is whizzing by slightly thanks to having Monday off! The weekend is creeping towards me and i feel it may be party party time!! Off out with Oliver on Saturday night and maybe a few others to shake things up! May be venturing out on friday too for a lil bit of "Popstarz" action (a great gay indie night in Kings Cross aka my fave club in London)

I see Jade Goody has made a private trip to India to apologise for her actions in the Celeb Big Brother house and learn more about the culture. The press are now slagging her off saying that how can it be a private trip when she is being followed everywhere by photographers and the press. I am not sure of the choice she has had in this matter, the press seem obsessed with her - it aint exactly her fault if she gets followed by them. Lets put this mess to rest now once and for all.

I see Channel 4 are having their "gay week" this week, a series of programmes for teens on gay issues i am taping a lot of them and there has been some really diverse and interesting stuff on there. If you are having a morning off this week check them out!

xx

"Clag, clang, clang went the trolley

Ding, ding, ding went the bell

Zing, zing, zing went my heartstrings

From the moment i saw him i fell"

Last night i went to see Rufus Wainwright at the London Palladium recreating Judy Garland's 1961 Carnegie Hall concert. It was sooo good! He was joined on stage by a full orchestra along with Judy Garland's daughter Lorna Luft, Rufus' sister Martha Wainwright (whose version of "Stormy Weather" blew the roof off!) and Rufus' mother Kate McGarrigle who played piano as Rufus sang "Somewhere Over The Rainbow". Tickets for this show were pretty expensive but it was worth every penny. Last night's show was being filmed for TV Broadcast and DVD release so keep your eyes peeled!


Also had a lovely evening with my friend Dan, We went to a dim sum restaurant in the West End and i discovered that i am retarded when it comes to eating with chopsticks, i dont think you are supposed to use them to stab the food and haul the whole thing in your mouth but thats what i did - not pretty!


Last night after Rufus we went onto Ghetto in Soho for their "Detox" night which was great fun and then met some lovely people and headed to a night called "Orange" at "Fire" in Vauxhall - very sweaty night indeed but lots of fun, Staying their til 8 am probably wasn't the best idea!! So as you may have guessed we didnt find anywhere to watch the Oscars ceremony. I can't say i am too happy about that. That's all!

I can't use missing the Oscars as an excuse for not commenting on some of the fashion highs and lows so here goes. I thought Cate Blanchett looked stunning, her figure is amazing and she always looks fabulous!

Reese Witherspoon seems to be coping well after splitting with her fit hubbie Ryan Phillippe. Great Colour!

Jodie Foster was most surprising! Who knew that she owned a dress or could walk in heels!!

Our gracious leader was also in attendance at the Vanity Fair party and looked ravishing!!

Not sure what was going on with Naomi Watts and Nicole Kidman. Bad colours and chunky ugly accessories!

I have been reading reviews of last night's ceremony and am glad to hear that Ellen Degeneres did a great job of hosting. Had to include a pic of Ellen and her gorgeous partner Portia De Rossi, One of the best looking couples in Hollywood!



Well that's the Oscars done for another year! Great to see such deserving winners in all the major categories - especially Martin Scorcese, His genius has finally been recognised - better late than never!

I spent saturday night with a rather lovely man, having great conversation, lots of alcohol and laughter. Definitely a promising and smiley development for 2007!

x

Yay!!

It's friday and it's pay day! how sexy is that!! I am in such a good mood today! mainly because i spent the evening in Soho last night with a rather lovely man! Not going to jinx anything by telling all just yet - all in good time though.

I have got a rather sore throat today which in one way is annoying but it has made me sound like Barry White or the guy who does the movie trailer voiceovers - even more sexy!

Have got a grand weekend planned!! Off out tonight with Pete! Not caught up for a while so that will be fun and then he is jetting off to Egypt tomorrow with Kaz! He is going to be working his sphinxter!! ya get me?

Tomorrow i am going to do some shopping as it has been a while, i am half looking forward to it but also feeling slightly sick at the thought of Oxford Street on a saturday. Stupid slow tourists + chav kids = Pippy : Portrait of a Serial Killer!

Sunday i am off to see the divine Rufus Wainwright at the London Palladium. He is performing Judy Garland's famous Carnegie Hall gig so that should be gayer than a leisurely stroll round Clapham Common with Kevin Spacey (getting mugged walking your dog at 3.30am, yeah right honey, the only doggie thing about that night was your position!!!)

I am taking the day off on Monday as hopefully i will be exhausted from watching the OSCARS!! If i can find anywhere to watch it!


THE IMAGINARY MEN OF PIPPY'S BOUDOIR


I am not sure how i have resisted putting this guy on til now. I just think he is stunning! He was in the amazing "This Life" and is simply adorably unrequitedly in love in "Love Actually" - it's Andrew Lincoln!!


xx

Who are you wearing?? Madonna!!

Yes at long last you can now buy Madonnas new range in H & M stores. Obviously i would look a little silly in a Madonna mac and Madonna heels! oh who am i kidding? i would be strutting my signature walk down Old Compton Street swishing with an ass that won't quit! Seriously the glasses may be quite tempting!

One of the great things about the London is the access to free entertainment. Last night Oliver and I tubed it up to Wembley to see a tv show being recorded. It was a new bbc show called "Schools Out" hosted by some guy called Danny Wallace. We were hoping for some good guests - we were slightly disappointed, we got Bill Turnbull (BBC Breakfast) Sally Lindsay (Shelly from Corrie) and Hannah Waterman (EX Eastenders). It was all ok but throughout the show i started to plot the death of Hannah Waterman, she seemed to think that everything was funny and had THE worst fake laugh! and managed to mention twice that she has been in Eastenders for 4 and a half years! whatever love! you aint in it no more and i cant remember a single storyline that you had whilst you were there, about as memorable as a luke warm glass of water or Mike Smith!

Although i love living in London, i have lots of friends and go out all over the place - i have to say it's a scary place to be at the moment, crime in this city is going crazy and no one seems able to control it. There is very little that people can do to protect themselves as people are too scared to confront the criminals. I seriously think that if i was on a really busy train and a gang of people attacked me, other passengers would be too frightened to help. The intimidation that people are faced with is horrendous. I heard a story recently of a man who was stabbed in the neck on the top deck of a busy bus and had to make his way downstairs and to the front of the bus before anyone would help him. He was covered in blood and it was only when the driver saw him that the bus stopped! I sometimes love the anonymity of this city, just being able to go about your business is great but sometimes i wish that there was more of a sense of community safety.

So there ya go a rather mixed bag today. I am in shock that it is only thursday, this has been the longest week! anyway it's friday tomorrow so tune in for a damn good bit of boudoir action - i am gagging for a squirt and a wipe!!

xx

More great news!!

Over the years i have seen many great acts live in concert from HUGE stars like Madonna, Michael Jackson and Prince to excellent bands like U2, REM and Radiohead. I do have to say that one of the best acts i have ever seen does not need the huge stage set or the massive lights show, just a spotlight and a piano is all it takes for this artist to blow her fans away with her amazing songs and heartfelt passion. I first saw Tori Amos on "Later with Jools Holland" singing acapella and was transfixed. Her debut album "Little Earthquakes" came out the same year i did (1993) and was one of a few albums that year that summed up all my emotions and teenage angst.

I have followed her career closely since then and despite the cynics out there slagging her off for copying Kate Bush's career, She has consistently released great album after great album of original, beautiful songs and her live shows are nothing short of extraordinary, she rarely plays the same set list twice, changing her show to suit her mood or the city she is in.

After a short break her new album "American Doll Posse" is released on May 1st and will be closely followed by a world tour. If you want to see a truly great artist perform live i suggest you keep your eyes peeled for tickets!!

I assume this is the album cover, Girl looks fierce!

xx

It's a gay dream!!

My pretties!! I come to you today with 2 stunning pieces of news (depending on which side of the stamp you lick) Firstly the news that after an age of negotiations it has finally been confirmed that "Sex and the City - The Movie" is on!! Kim Cattrall was the main reason for the delay allegedly. The original scriptwriters of the series have apparently come up with a corking script! After watching the last episode i thought it all tied up rather nicely but now i know that this is happening the possibilites are quite endless!! I just hope we get more scenes with all 4 of the girls together - something the last episode was severely lacking.

The second even more stunning piece of news is that it is now heavily rumoured that the Spice Girls are going to reunite for a tour later this year! Let's face it - most of them could do with the career and posh cant shop and hang out with Katie Holmes forever. I actually imagine Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes to be quite dull, do they get mash up at parties, wake up on bean bags covered in cat hair? or does Tom just follow around all night tugging at the bottom of your shirt? silly little man!

This last week has been a bit strange, I have builders invading my bathroom all week, knocking walls down and covering everything in dust! I am having to cart all my products around with me and it is starting to bug me, thank god for hats!! no one needs to see my hair first thing in a morning - i am not sure how i sleep but i always wake up with 2 bits sticking up at the back that look scarily like devil's horns. Thankfully there is a shower room at work, i of course forget that other people need to use it and spend ages ferreting through my bag for overpriced bits of grease to slather on!

Some people thought it was a bit sick when i put Daniel Radcliffe in my boudoir but he is in todays "Heat" as their torso of the week so it aint just me who has noticed the cheeky little minx! His play has been getting rave reviews, i must try and get tickets but the theatre is so bloomin expensive!! If anyone has any good contacts for cheap tickets feel free to let me know!!

xx

Well it had to happen sometime, Britney has finally lost it! She now looks like an extra from "Bad Girls". I dont know why anyone is surprised - check out her song titles over the years, they dont exactly stink of sanity

"Toxic"

"I'm a slave 4 u"

"Oops i did it again"

"Hit me baby one more time"

"Overprotected"

"Not a girl, not yet a woman"

"you drive me crazy"

The sad thing is that the media and indeed celeb obsessed bloggers like myself have been going on about the inevitable Britney meltdown for months now so why hasn't her manager, parents or friends done anything about it. They just seem to have been spoonfeeding her crazy. It's the kids i feel sorry for their momma Britney leaves the house and comes back as Kojak. Word of advice honey - get your ass on ebay and buy your frikkin hair back!

I have just had such a lovely weekend. I was back in Sheffield for work but also play. I saw my lovely lovely main girl Emma on friday and her beautiful son Stanley (i now have pictures on my phone!! Bless!!) It was great to see Emma - we went out to Cafe Rouge in the Peace Gardens in Sheffield and had such a lovely catch up. It's great how even though our lives are so different we just seem to fit together.

The rest of the weekend was spent with the gays! As Joss Stone would say - big big love to Dan, Danny, Matt, Deeds and Aidan. Friday night was the gay disco at Sheffield Uni and i have to say it was only ok, saturday was spent on the sofa at dan's watching a marathon of "America's Next Top Model" - i really, really love this show!! Sadly i dont have Living TV at home so can only seem to see this show by invading other peoples houses! Tyra Banks is hilariously dramatic and all the girls are just bitch, bitch, bitch!

This week is looking really busy! It's also payday on friday so yay - i shall be able to eat again! At the moment i am on the "Devil Wears Prada" diet, i dont eat anything then when i feel like i am about to faint, i have a cube of cheese. Next weekend is just going to be so exciting!! Not only will i have cash in my account but i am going to see the musical genius that is Mr. Rufus Wainwright and it's the biggest gayest night of the year!! Yeah it's the OSCARS - i dont know where i am going to be watching them yet but i am sure i will find somewhere! If i miss them there will be hell to pay!

Bye lovelies

xx

hey,

just a quickie to say that me and Dan have been laughing at this all weekend!! its the gift that keeps on giving - howdy y'all its lil miss joss stone!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZaR_RG3DpJk

enjoy!!

Up North again!

Hey guys,

yeah i am writing this blog sat in my parent's house as i am in Sheffield for work but decided to make a weekend of it! The folks are downstairs watching "Most Haunted" - they are really into it but it's just so fake! Cameramen banging into walls does not a ghost make!

Will be trying to meet up with as many people as possible this weekend as well as going to "Climax" which is Sheffield University's gay night, it was one of the 1st gay nights i ever went to so it holds a special place in my heart - plus those students love their cheap booze so will hopefully be booty shaking on a podium tomorrow night.

THE IMAGINARY MEN OF PIPPY'S BOUDOIR

i have been meaning to feature this hottie for a LONG time!! He has just split up with his fiance aka Alanis Morrisette. He has just got that chest, leg, man thing going on and that is the perfect way to end the week, exploring that chest will take all weekend!!

xxx

The Daily Star Can Fuck Off!

Someone tell these muppets that they are not a newspaper! they are a waste of my eyesight, they crap all over the movement for this country to be more accepting and diverse. The homophobic twats have deided that todays big front cover story is that "Coronation Street" is going to show SHOCKING scenes of a gay kiss before the 9pm watershed.

Just to let you know that it is 2007, gay people exist and every once in a while we kiss each other. Homophobic headlines like these put out such a hideous message of hatred - it just pisses me off!!

Rant over

Ooooh get her!!
It's thursday so yet another moment of appreciation for "Never Mind The Buzzcocks", Last nights show was fantastic!! Simon Amstell on form as ever and mardy ass Preston storming off just cos Amstell was making a few soft jibes at him and his wife. I could tell from the start that Preston was out of sorts, he usually comes across really well - a rabbit in the headlights of fame but last night he was viva la diva!
Of course last night was also "The Brit Awards" - in the last few years this show has really lost its sparkle but i had a glimmer of hope for this year knowing that a) Russell Brand was hosting and b) it was going to be broadcast live!. I thought that the rock stars would all get pissed and coked out of their faces and fall onto the stage groping each other. Sadly it just seemed to be lts of dull stars with nothing much to say.
I was happy with the winners though. Loved the Arctic Monkeys little speeches dressed as characters from the "Wizard of Oz" and the Village People. I have changed my tune on Amy Winehouse and was really happy to see her win Best Female. The Killers and Justin Timberlake definitely deserved their awards as did the sublime James Morrison. The Scissor Sisters seemed to steal the show with their bizarre puppetry style performance and Russell Brand did a grand job of hosting. The only problem - Joss Stone! What was that about?? She walked on stage like Ru Paul!!! I feel the need for a letter
Dear Ms Stone,
Hope you are well, There is no doubt that you are a great performer and can indeed wail a tune like a bad ass diva but i am saddened to say you keep shocking me..... for all the wrong reasons.
In 2005 you were awarded a Brit award for Best Urban Act. I was wondering if you could point out the specific urban area of Dover where you grew up? I have been to Dover many times and have never heard any of the locals yapping in an American accent looking like a drag queen announcing the start of the gay pride march with a grand chrous of "You Better Work Bitch"
You are truly talented honey but dont forget your roots, there is nothing worse than a fake american accent so lose it honey before you go and do a total Jamie Bell!
Love and Kisses
Pippy
ps -never ask a gay man what you should wear to an awards show when he has no invite, he will use all his power to make you look like a drag queen who goes by the name - "Fonda Cox"

xxx

Hey,
Another weekend gone! but hey it was a grand one. Was out in Soho on friday night for the first of Kaz's birthday celebrations. Loads of people came out and it was great to catch up and get mash up! We ended up in G-A-Y which was a bit random but we had a good laugh at the expense of others so all fine. I woke up at Kaz's on 2 bean bags at 1 in the afternoon which is surely a sign of a good night, made the long trek south of the river to get home and washed and next thing i know i am heading into town to meet the lovely mr. ancil, mr tomkins and mr. simmons - more drinks and even a splashing of thai food made for a good evening.

That took me to 9pm but the night was still young so off i popped to Hammersmith to hook up with Dan at his hotel bar to manipulate his drinks account. Had a totally filthy catch up and cackled quite a lot whilst having innapropriate conversations about the joy of men! Then had to struggle to get home on what seemed like a gazillion night buses! Thank god for my ipod!

Sunday afternoon i woke up feeling surprisingly dandy. Met Dan and Camilla at the cinema to catch "Babel" - a rather intense film (it seems that next time i see a film with Camilla it needs to be totally shallow and have a high man factor!) far too much intensity but really great. Loved how the stories and characters inter linked, its a shame it seems to be getting ignored by most of the award shows.

Spent sunday night at Oliver's watching the BAFTA's and discovering the joys of Sambuca! I usually look forward to the BAFTA's but this years were a major disappointment mainly due to the hideously embarassing host -Jonathan Ross, i dont know who wrote his gags for him but they need shooting - it's safe to say he died on his arse!! I was happy with most of the winners and it was great to see Ricky Gervais wipe the floor with Mr.Ross. Also grand to see Daniel Craig, James McAvoy and Jake Gyllenhaal in their tux's!

Yesterday was Kaz's birthday and she had booked a table for 5 at Jamie Oliver's "Fifteen" restaurant in East London. None of us has been before and i have to say it was one of the best meals i have had in London. The service was outstanding and the food was perfect. We had gone for the set menu and part of me thought the staff might rush us out of the place but they gave us all the time we needed. I highly recommend this place and £25 for 3 courses is a great deal - check it out!

A few drinks followed in Hoxton Square but i think we were all quite shattered and full up! Lovely to see Kaz, T, Dawn and of course Pete - if only all mondays were like this it would make the rest of the week more bearable!

Well it's Valentines Day tomorrow and even though i think it's a total joke and an excuse for card companys to rip us all off - it would be nice to receive at least one! boo hoo and i am working tomorrow night so i doubt there will be love on the cards! Although the horizon is looking a lot brighter in that respect but i am keeping that card very close to my chest... for the time being

It's the Brit Awards tomorrow night so hopefully my video recorder will chug into action and there will of course be a full review later this week

xx

R.I.P Anna Nicole!
I was so shocked last night to hear that Anna Nicole Smith had died, it's always sad when someone dies before their time. I was never a particular fan of hers but she has been around for a long time and its just very sad. In the past she had been seen as a bit of a joke but with the recent death of her son and birth of her daughter she seemed to be getting her life back on track. The outrageous clothes and behaviour had gone and she was presenting a better version of herself.

The weekend is here again and i am really looking forward to it, having been ill for most of the week i am finally feelin better and looking forward to hooking up with Pete and Kaz to celebrate Kaz's birthday!!! Let's get mash up girl!! Kaz was my dancing partner for Pete's 40th and once you have done a madonna routine in full drag together, tried blonde wigs and high heeled boots on in Dalston - there is a bond that can never be broken!!

Well it's the BAFTA Awards on sunday night and i usually really look forward to this event and for once it is not for the glamour or the possibility of seeing Daniel Craig or Jake Gyllenhaal in a tux - It's all about the host, for the last few years Stephen Fry has hosted and has made them worth watching - i need not say that the man is a genius. Sadly Mr. Fry has hung up his tie and had enough so instead we have Jonathan Ross, dont mind him, can be quite funny but does he have to host everything?? I have a feeling the tone will be brought down this year and thats a shame. Roll on the Oscars - I think Ellen Degeneres will be one of the best hosts we have seen in a longtime!

Great new band that have slipped onto my ipod - The Holloways! Great lil catchy indie tunes - check out their myspace - www.myspace.com/theholloways

THE IMAGINARY MEN OF PIPPY'S BOUDOIR

After last weeks rather erm interesting and slightly wrong choice i am back with a man who just oozes sex apeal, He has been around for a long time but never really hit the big time. He was in the final series of "Will and Grace" and i could not help but notice his beautiful smile and the pecs ripping through his shirt. I dig Taye Diggs! Cop a load of these

Ooh baby Ow!!

Right it's friday - I'm drinkin, who's buying?

xx

Puking Pippy

Well folks, I am ill again!! Yes me ill! i have been off work all week and generally feel like death - i thought i was feeling better but last night my stomach reminded me that i should not speak to soon! I am so bored at home!! I have done all the dvd's, watched one too many property programmes and downloaded far too many songs.

There is one thing that keeps me going though, it's the moment on "This Morning" where Fern Britton and Philip Schofield totally lose it. There are very few things funnier than 2 people who cant stop laughing - it just sets me off! Check this out -

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tlh3yrPt4A

I was watching "Never Mind The Buzzcocks" last night - it is so much better since Simon Amstell took over. He is the mian reason i watch it but apart from him there was one other very good reason to watch and another good reason to turn over. The other main draw of the show last night was the hilarious Noel Fielding from "The Mighty Boosh" (which i am just getting into and am finding hilarious! Check out youtube for all the episodes.) The reason i wanted to turn over was that total twat Donny Tourette from the band "The Towers of London" - he is about as punk as Celine Dion! oh he is so crazy with his peroxide out of control hair and smoking fags. Apparently a few weeks ago him and the rest of his (daddy can i have a loan for a new guitar please? thanks awfully, toodle pip) band trashed the toilets in "The Hawley Arms" pub in Camden - now i dont care whether you are a punk, a tranny or australian you dont fuck up good boozers, save it for hotel rooms you crazy kids!

Ah Hollyoaks, Hollyoaks, Hollyoaks! What are you doing to me?? You say you are going to do a gay kiss and then its all just a big letdown! I am enjoying the performance of the main character in this storyline though and hope they at least explore his coming out further or they could always banish him to London with the rest of the gays.

It has been great to see Laurie Metcalf in "Desperate Housewives" these past few weeks, Her performance in the last episode was outstanding. I will always fondly remember her for playing Roseanne Barr's sister Jackie in "Roseanne" - Here is one of my favourite Jackie scenes - her father has just died and she has to let the family know

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v_1Yot6qXNQ

As you may be able to tell i have gone a bit you tube crazy these last few days!!

I saw 2 excellent films last weekend "Notes on a Scandal" starring Cate Blanchett and Judi Dench. I was a bit concerned before i went, I do love Dame Judi but sometimes think she plays the same character a lot, I should not have worried - she is terrifying!! Cate is instantly adorable and always seems to make acting look so easy. The 2nd film i saw was the truly amazing "Dreamgirls" - i know that i am a big old mo and this film had everything that a gay could want - drama, songs, sequins, bitchy women and wigs but the film os so much more than that. The performances are fantastic - Beyonce is great, Eddie Murphy is on form and Jeniffer Hudson is spellbinding! A special mention should go to the 3rd dreamgirl Anika Noni Rose is hilarious and had me in stitches for most of the film. Check them out!!

Hopefully i shall be feeling better tomorrow, Want to be on top form for my boudoir!!

xx

The weekend already.

Well this week has flown by!! I got home last night and watched the final part of "5 days" which left me quite annoyed and very confused. I have stuck with this drama, it has been a bit slow at times but i was really looking forward to a great conclusion but the final episode was all over the place! The ending was rushed and made very little sense. I thought it was just me but looking at some internet forums it seems i am not alone. Such a shame that a great drama let itself down at the last hurdle.

It looks like we have a big gay kiss coming our way in "Hollyoaks" land next week. I really hope that they break new ground by showing the general population that gay men do actually kiss for more than half a second. I want some man on man lip action not a fuzzy camera angle that pulls away at the last minute. The show is way before the 9pm watershed and i imagine it will get complaints like "Coronation Street" did a few years ago. It's bizarre how the sight of 2 individuals expressing their love for each other can be so offensive when a serial killer on "Coronation Street" bludgeoning people to death is totally acceptable - oh what a world we live in.

Very exciting news if you are a Harry Potter geek like me! The new book is out on the 21st July!! Its the last one in the series and should be a corker, although i am not a huge fan of J.K Rowling's style - 300 pages of fluff and then all the action crammed in to the last 100 pages but i just love it. I love that it has got children interested in books, I love how it takes over everywhere and nearly everyone on the tube has a copy. Speaking of Harry Potter - i will now reluctantly move onto....

THE IMAGINARY MEN OF PIPPY'S BOUDOIR!

I don't usually go for men younger than myself and as long term readers will know it is usually the rather burly looking bloke that catches my eye however, every so often my type changes - at the moment i seem to be longing for a bit of geek chic lovin! There is something mysterious about the "geek" factor, beneath that rather awkward exterior could well be a volcano of unbridled passion!

Sometimes a rather attractive man can have been staring you in the face for ages before you realise that with a little bit of help he can turn into a total hottie. So it was with shock and amazement that this week i saw pictures of someone who i would never majorly consider fit looking rather stunning. The pictures were in one of the many London papers and i sat on the train on my way home, mouth open, unable to catch my breath - it's none other than Daniel Radcliffe aka Harry Potter. Yes i know!!! How wrong is that? He is performing in the west end later this month at the Gielgud Theatre in "Equus" - a rather challenging play which sees him performing naked!!! Here are the pics, dont judge me!

Apparently many parents have been complaining on Harry Potter websites saying he should not be doing this - like hello he is an actor!! i imagine he is doing this to cast aside the assumption that all he can do is Harry Potter. He was pretty good in that episode of "Extras" and who knows i may even have to purchase a ticket for this show - a perv? moi? why yes dear!

Boo you whores!!

xx

Hey,

I was at a conference yesterday for teachers - i must add that i am not a teacher and never have been but it was strangely satisfying to be mistaken for one! "So where do you teach?" asked one tweed jacket wearing gentleman. "Old Compton Street mainly" i replied - ok i didn't really - just trying to make myself sound more adventurous than i actually am. What a lovely bunch of teachers they were though, i mentioned the word gay at least 1000 times yesterday and none of them so much as vommited! The times they are a changing!

I registered for Glastonbury tickets this morning and i have to say it was relatively kerfuffle free! Just filled in the online registration form, popped a photo on there and off it sent! Of course come the 1st april i am sure it will be hellish on the phone lines and the website - all this just so a burly security guard can have a good laugh at my passport photo when i get to the festival.

Well the weekend is fast approaching and plans are afoot for as good one. My lovely lovely friend Dan is down in London for work and i am sure at some point we will be trolling round soho, doing high kicks and getting molested by G-A-Y flyer boys! It's also my friend James birthday on saturday so drinks will be happening then too. Also meeting up with the lovely Oliver and the lovely Pete. It's a proper lads weekend, Grrr!!

When i was a wee gay boy out in the ruralness of nowhere, i had to grab every opportunity i got to hear or see anything that related to being gay. Julian Clary was great for me in that respect - he managed to be mainstream whilst still being able to get away with almost anything, he is still enjoying success over 20 years on. I was reading his "New Statesman" column onlne a while ago and came across this, it made me laugh and i hope it will for you too.

"it's been a bit of a Claire Sweeney week. I went to the Golden Joystick Awards but it turned out to be about computer games. How Rupert Everett is that? I had too many Charles Kennedys and found myself in a Naomi Campbell situation with a right Dale Winton. He wants to go to Malawi and do a Madonna but doesn't want to be accused of the Jonathan Kings. Went to a Jamie Oliver-style restaurant and ate like Michelle McManus. Suspect that my career has a touch of the Michael Barrymores. Feel like doing a John Stonehouse. To stop myself sliding into the full Gazza, I popped a couple of Judy Garlands and soon felt pretty Fern Britton. Was offered some Kate Moss and a sniff of Peter Sellers but didn't want to end up all Pope John Paul II. Woke up naked in a very Trinny and Susannah flat. Suspect I've been Paris Hiltoned by a right John Leslie. Borrowed some Phillip Schofield clothes and got a taxi driven by a Ronnie Corbett. The price was very Trisha Goddard. Was locked out of my flat and nearly did a Geri Halliwell in the street, but the Stephen Dorff upstairs invited me in and we did a Preston and Chantelle on the hearthrug. Once I caught a glimpse of his Linford Christie, I came over all Linda Lovelace and pretty soon it was Gillian Taylforth time. By the time I got home I was thoroughly Tony Blaired."

Hopefully my weekend will not stray too far away from that description. I would ideally like to wake up on monday morning feeling like Jade Goody's career.

xx